I finally did something about how I have been feeling....
So It seems I found my way back, I've been burying my head in the sand. for months now... and this week I finally did something about the way I've been feeling.
This blog is to help me stay clean and sober and give hope to others that no matter how low you have had to go to hit your rock bottom, that there is hope. After the gift of desperation, I am now 3 years and 5 months clean as of March 2021
Today is my birthday and as of today, I will be blogging on a regular basis, the reason? Because i need to stay accountable. Looking back over the past 6 months I've realised I may have been heading for a fall. My mental health has suffered, my self-esteem and my thinking is definitely getting, how shall i put it? Wonky to say the least. I've spent days crying and sobbing until bedtime, and other days bedtime has been all day as the thought of getting out of bed was just too much. Lockdown surly has been a factor, but it is definitely not the sole reason for my little meltdown. The main thing is i recognised it, i got in contact with my Doctor and i have a pending assessment with the mental health wellbeing team next week.
So the moral to today's post, no matter if your clean and/or sober and have been for sometime, always have your "wonky thinking" radar working, as you might not be headed for a relapse now, or next week, you may never be headed for a relapse but prevention is better than cure and also, it's not just about being sober, its about feeling well, feeling that you can cope and living life and I'm just grateful i have recognised this before anything got worse.
if you are not feeling yourself, don't wait until its too late, call a friend, your Doctor, The Samaritans or even me, as long as its someone, anybody is better than nobody.
take care
J . Doe
